Monday, 17 June 2013

The Will To Fight

Life teaches us lessons in the most mysterious ways.

For me, there were hidden lessons to learn when I accepted an invitation to a martial arts class a good friend of mine was personally teaching.  To be precise, I would call it a roller coaster ride on self-discovery.

I will not go into the details of getting there, but the setting of the class does deserve special mention.  As martial arts classes go, this venue was a red flag as far as martial arts classes that this was SERIOUS stuff. 

The venue, an old clan association in the 4 storey shop house in China Town, a quick description on the place.. Huge double doors open into a vast hall where the ground floor is an old clan association, the walls all lined with black and white photos of ancestors long past, a long long wooden table filled the hallway with rows of old high backed chairs lining the walls.  On the second floor, a huge altar holding all the ancestral tablets that I had to make my way past.  On the third level, there was a row of olden Chinese Pole arms along the wall, the lion and dragon heads, and all manners of lion and dragon dance items. 

On the roof, the roof extended partway, and there, open to the sky was the training mat.  Plus of course there was another altar where Justice Bao, The Monkey God, and a whole manner of other war deities were overlooking the training ground.

A quiet whimper I was very aware of sounded like, “What have I gotten myself into?”

Most martial arts classes are categorised by “grade”, and most often “grades” do not get into “fights” with each other until they are very advanced.  This was a very old school class.  I was simply paired with a scarily built senior by height, with no regard for experience or training, and the next instruction was simply, “Let’s Spar.”

With the Gods of War watching, there was no room to back out or turn chicken, barely after a warm-up, here I was standing on the sparing mat squared off against my opponent. Oh, did I mention that this was a Sanda/Sanshou class? 

In essence, it is one of the most practical martial arts forms, meaning to say, JUST WIN THE FIGHT.  There will be kicks, punches, elbows, knee strikes.. get too close and there will be sweeps and throws.  I was way out of my depth, the blows came from all manner of direction and angles and they HURT!  Each round was supposed to last for 2 minutes but they were agonisingly slow!!

2 minutes and landing on my back a couple of times, I got off the mat bruised and winded.  So ended round 1.  After the rest of the pairings had their rounds, it was my turn again.  So begins round 2.  This time, I was paired with a skinny tall Chinese guy.  Looks and sounds a lot less painful as the dark giant from round 1.  Boy was I wrong.  Big dark giant lands heavy punches and low kicks so I had time to brace for each hit.  Skinny guy was fast and the kicks were low, middle AND high.  

The lessons were simple.  Drop your guard, get hurt bad.  However, the problem was this.. If you want to keep yourself from getting hurt, you keep your guard up.  The problem is, you can’t hit the other guy either.  Nobody ever won a fight by NOT hitting back.  Hence, the internal wrestle within me was to ATTACK, and despite my modest attempts, to hit hard knowing that I will be opening my guard for a kick or punch to get through.

Round 3, this time, my opponent was another big guy, this time, he looked fat.  Here’s some advice from me looking back.  FAT GUYS ARE NOT SLOW!! And they can hit really fast and hard.  Landing on your butt on the far side of the mat from a single punch is painful, and I was learning fast to get out of the way of that shot really quick, or brace when it comes.

As much as this was a martial arts class, the quick lesson for me, was that the biggest opponent was always within me.  1 hour into the class, every fibre of my being was screaming for me to “pass” my turn and keep out of the ring, to stay someplace, ANYPLACE that’s far away from the mat and the scary seniors who are dishing out the pain, and I suspect, enjoying it.

When my turn came again, looking across the mat at my next opponent, there was always a choice, step in, there WILL be pain.  Stay outside, no pain.  However, I was fast coming to realise that facing my opponent in the ring, and attacking him despite knowing I am opening myself to be hit, IS the lesson for today.  With the Gods of War watching, I stepped in, again, and again, and again.  The fights were losing battles, but the one battle I knew I could not lose was the one with Fear.

“Can lose to opponent, but never lose to fear”, once you start running in life, you will never stop running.  This was my first lesson.

Over the course of the few months, I came back again, and again.  Each time leaving with bruises both to the body and the ego.  But each trip I made, I won a victory within myself, for myself.
During my time as a leader meeting potential new associates, a question that I am posed very often is this, “What are the ingredients necessary to succeed?”

Today, I will add one that I call, “The Will To Fight”.

Life to the business owner is never a walk-in-the-park.  Your obstacles and challenges more often seem doggedly determined to keep you from your path.  Each challenge, frightfully tougher and daunting than the last.  Each battle, right after the last, following the next one, and the next one, and the next one. 

Each fight, your mind, body and soul screaming to you, “WHY?!”

To all new associates, the tunnel is a long and dark one with your obstacles all in place to way-lay you.  Each fight is a fight you must win to get to the other side.  Each fight will have more reasons for you to turn away, than to advance and fight, again, and again, and again.

Tonight let me put a face onto your adversary.  However logical and reasonable and excuse otherwise, the opponent is always the same, it is within you, it is your fear.

Thus, I leave you with this,

“Can lose to opponent, but never lose to fear.  Get up, and fight.”

To my Newbies, this is a rite of passage that your seniors have made before, it is your turn now.  Be assured that it is a fight for yourselves, but you will never be alone.

-- 
Best Regards,

 

Mervin Tang
Group Director
Division Lead Trainer, Project Sales
CEA Reg No. : R030951Z
Huttons Asia Pte Ltd


Mobile: (65) 9184 0208 

Website: http://www.SGrealestate.sg
Sales Enquiry: mervintang@SGrealestate.sg


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